Sunday, December 24, 2006

Snow Day

Adults never get them but I'm taking one. Maybe at the end I'll be less confused. Or at least less hung over. Whatever.

Girls On Film

So now we come to the tricky part where I have to figure out New Years.

First there's Sophia, who I know wants to do New Year's with me but it might be too much drama. Clearly neither of us want the drama that comes with being together, but if even a little bit of egg nog - okay and like four tequila shots but whatever - makes us make out in a shoe closet, then that's gonna happen. And maybe for the first time, ever, that's not what I want from an incredible, gorgeous, cool girl. What in the world is going on?

Then Jenny. Jenny's like, hey, my brother and his band are going to MTV for New Year's and you should come. Which would be cool. And I love Jenny, like, love her. But I feel like her brother totally reads Jennys blog, has definitely seen the Sunset Heat episodes, and will beat the crap out of me if he ever meets me. Unless he's a really skinny indie rock boy and then whatever. But it might not be the best idea. Also, maybe Jenny needs to run free a little bit so she can meet a guy who wants her as more than just a friend?

And Eva. Eva is cool. She makes sense. I love hanging out with her. But if I spend New Year's with her, even though they should theoretically be cool with it, neither Jenny nor Sophia will ever forgive me for it. Because they're girls, which means they're jealous and picky and insane. But also amazing and gorgeous, so maybe it's their right.

Finally, Chaucer. My dog. He'd love to spend New Year's with me. And he likes to cuddle and stay up all night so there you go. The perfect date. And nobody can be jealous of that.


I don't really love Christmas because I don't really love my family, but I have to admit, there's something really fun about the iconography...

Friday, December 22, 2006

The Ins and Outs...

Here's the latest list, and speaking of MySpace:


And no, for those of you who have been emailing, Sophia and I are definitely NOT dating so stop asking.

Wednesday, December 20, 2006

Denial: The Sunset Heat Way

Okay, I'm not even going to talk about what happened at Eva's Christmas party on Saturday (I think Eva and Sophia have done a pretty good job of describing it, ugh). Instead, here's my crack at the Sunset Heat survey, which, thank god, has nothing to do with making out with Sophia in a shoe closet.

Here we go...

Name: Sebastian Paraguas
Age: 23
Favorite Color: Burnt Sienna. Not really but I like that there was a color like that in the crayon box. Plus when I met Sienna in London last year I called her that. I don't think she got it. Anyway.
Favorite Song: Which Will by Nick Drake
Favorite Movie: City of God and Pollack.
Favorite Websites: I love which is not very arty but whatever
Favorite Store: Jeffrey. Everywhere else there are cute salesgirls to distract me. That one has mostly guys.
Favorite Restaurant: It's my mission to find the best steak in New York City. So far, Peter Luger's, but I still haven't gotten to STK.
Favorite Hobby: BEATING EVA AT TRIVIAL PURSUIT, EVA YOU ARE SUCH A CHEATER. Okay, for real, it's painting and also walking my dog, Chaucer, on the Park Loop.
Favorite Place: The park loop, with Chaucer.
Secret Wish: I wish so many people didn't know about my family and my money. It's not so fun. I don't want to be on SocialiteRank or whatever.
Not So Secret Wish: A Whitney Retrospective.
Biggest Achievement: Getting my parents to accept that I want to do art.
You’ll Never Be Without… Girls in my life causing drama!!!!!

Friday, December 15, 2006

Action Jackson

Unleash your inner plagarist at

Tuesday, December 12, 2006

Pace Yourself

Dear Eva,

I remember this one time on Juergen's yacht, we were all a little traumatized because The Socialite came with someone, and none of us knew how to deal with her. It was like two years ago and she was perfectly nice but sort of on another planet.

What I remember most is the one night when we tried to make sangria, only we didn't have any red wine left so we made it with vodka, in this plastic cooler that we'd bought at the airport. We were pretty trashed and Juergen had this fabulous (fabulous = dumb. but awesome. but dumb.) idea. He leans over the railing of the boat and he goes "Hey Socialite! Did you know that Sebastian's an artist? You should pose for him!"

Of course The Socialite hears the word "Pose" and it's all over. She immediately jumps over to our deck and plops herself down and says "paint me! paint me!"

And then she peels off her sundress and she holds it over her head like a sail, and lets the wind catch it, and lets it float away. Now she's got no clothes.

"Uh, dude," I mumble to Juergen but it's already too late because The Socialite is splayed on the dock in what she thinks is an "artsy" pose - no expression on her face, shoulders sharpened, spine crumbled, total mess - and she goes "paint me!"

Then her hot pink Sidekick rings.

"Hello," she says, and she flips over. Her belly button is pierced and she is wearing body glitter instead of tanning oil. "Omigosh," she goes, and she sits up, like cold water just hit her. "Really? Where? You guys?" and she turns to us. "You guys, I have to go. There's a party. I can't miss a party."

She says it like a sugar junkie talks about their brownies. It's sort of scary.

"I can't miss a party," she says over and over.

And then the Socialite jumps, drunk and buck naked, from the yacht into the ocean.

"What are you doing?" yells Juergen.

"I've got to get to the party!" she screams back.

We never saw her again, but the next week, the Socialite's photo was in US Weekly, at the party. She had wet hair and a Cavalli dress, and the caption said "beachy hair is in for summer!"

Anyway Eva, this is why I'm scared to go to your Christmas party. So I'm not gonna RSVP quite yet. Let's just say I'll think about it.


Wednesday, December 06, 2006

The Babe of Basel

If you're lucky enough to be in Miami this week, stop by the Peter Seidler exhibit at the Design Center and introduce yourself to the lovely and amazing artist/model/economist/whatever Greer Smith (yeah that's her on the left): 3940 North Miami Avenue in the Design District., 8pm-12 am. Should be a blast.

As for me, I am NOT in Miami so I'm off to dinner with Sophia, who is taking me somewhere called Zen Palate, which I assume has fake meat. I am so not stoked about this but weirdly, Sophia's not as clueless as she seems and sometimes, she has great ideas (once in Sunset Heat I wanted to paint but didn't have a canvas; she asked the pool boy for a patio umbrella, helped me dismantle it, and voila, canvas... sort of genius actually).

Wish me luck - me and tofu are not so good together.

Monday, December 04, 2006

A Gawkward Pause

Sophia keeps calling me about the Employees Only party tonight and if I want to go. And I do, but it's hard going to parties with Sophia because no other girls will come near us! It's like we have a forcefield around us and nobody can come close. No fun. And definitely no new girls. Any solutions on how to solve this? It was exactly the same way in Sunset Heat too, I'll never forget when she pushed Jenny into the pool...

Anyway, just got psyched because Gawker started a new feature, where they fill empty ad space with up-and-coming artwork (my favorite by Sophia Peers is above). I'm wondering what I should submit - does a parody of a perfume campaign count?