You Can't Handle the Truth

Really weirded out because Eva just called like 30 minutes ago.

I'm like - hey, shouldn't you be dancing on a table or on a lap somewhere?

No - she says - it's important.

You must be drunk - I answer, and she says - I wish. Look. If I knew something that, as a friend, you would want to know, but if I knew that, as a friend, your feelings would be massively hurt, would you still want me to tell you?

Eva - I said - we're not friends. All this "as a friend" stuff is throwing me off. What the hell is going on?

And Eva started crying and I swear, this is poor form of me, but I swear, I thought she was gonna say she liked me the whole time on vacation, and she'd stolen Sophia's phone so she couldn't call me back or whatever. Like I said, poor form, but it's really what I thought. And then Eva corrected me because she said - you know I love Jenny, right? And I'm like - how can anyone not love Jenny? Remember the one time when she finger painted with maple syrup on our pancakes at the beach? How cool was that? And Eva goes - it's very cool and I slept with her boyfriend.

Big pause.


And Eva keeps going - and I didn't mean to and we were drunk but it's why he broke up with her, why Reed did, because he wanted to go out with me, and then we went on vacation, and I got so uncomfortable and guilty that now we can't talk and she thinks I hate her but I'm afraid she'll hate me.

And Eva starts to cry, on the phone, at 2 am, and I'm shocked.

And I say - Eva, it's gonna be okay, do you need to come over?

And she says - no, I just needed to tell someone, and I feel better, and I'm gonna go to bed. And do I promise not to tell Jenny.

And I promise her, because she's really upset, because I really like her, because I really like Sophia, but I also really like Jenny. She's my girl, she's my kid, she's my... I can't lie to her and NOT tell her, you know?

So now I'm thinking... I have to say this to Jenny with my art. This will be my biggest challenge, and if it works, my greatest triumph.

Whoa I just sounded like Doctor Evil.

But still. Gotta tell Jenny, somehow. Maybe with wire sculpture. Nothing says "Yo, I love you but your best friend is a hag" like an amazing piece of wire sculpture, right?

Stay tuned...